The coolest thing about this office space is that this is where I will begin the chapters of my book. This excites me. Just to be down here in this 'space' that is mine makes me happy and i feel so grown up :) I actually got to hit 'print' from my lap top and the printer turned right on. I didn't have to travel from one room to the next, hook it up, wait. so executive!
there isn't much significance to this post, but maybe a time marker as to when i shall begin. hopefully there will be progress.
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why is there a line?
i guess it is symbolic of thoughts not read or reached. I wish i had the simplicity of mind to talk about trivial matters. Perhaps I do. I think it comes down to my own choice, but also being married to one, who always chooses his words and discussions carefully that I, too, have grown into that a bit.
so, that line i guess is really bothering me. A line that is separating a tangent of excited outlook to something that grounds me in a complicated way. I am an Eeyore, looking to be more like Pooh. this is not a compliment to self. I yearn for purpose.
2012 Goals:
1. begin book
2. take a trip on my own - whether it be san fran or paris --- still in the works at this time
3. find moments of frivolity
4. connect with those who offer authenticity and remind me of the joy i share with them
5. try not to see myself as getting old (this will be tough, as i turn 44 in a matter of weeks)
6. get in shape: enough so that i don't have to buy pants that go up to my belly button (sign of old age).
7. figure out what is important to me - list it and live it
8. take advantage of kids being home - take them out more often with me. at LEAST 4 times each before the dawn of a new year. Today, sidney and i went to office max together...there....one down!
9. fill in the blanks
10. i don't want to say, "take time for me." this is bogus. we all find time just for ourselves. I think what will be important to me this year is to take time to define my boundaries, and even harder, will be to stay within those boundaries.
side story:
This goes with the Eeyore wanting to be pooh bear and it bubbled within the mindset. When i was teaching, I had on the schedule, SASTR. This stood for Stop And Smell The Roses. This was a time for my class of 25 or so students to have some productive down time (is that possible). I would set in place art stations, poetry stations, picture viewing time, puzzles, science station, and even had the kids work on independent projects of their own agenda -- etc. About 3 times a week, every student had that time to stop what we were doing and take a moment to relax, ponder, think outside the proverbial box. It was excellent in theory and many students thrived during SASTR time. They would eat up that Right Brain time. i knew this was good. But, I hated it. during those times, I would nod over the to teacher aide or parent helper, tap my coffee cup and take off for up to 10 minutes to the teacher lounge. I loved the end result, i just didn't like being involved in it. The same would happen when the art teacher came in to teach a lesson. I would hang out, be hands on, but when the 'creativity' got too much for me :), i would take a nice stroll through the elementary halls.
So, what does this say about my personality.
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a longer post than i had intended.
Goal for 2012: find the pooh bear within me. I have read the Tao of Pooh twice throughout these years and it leaves me hanging for attainment.
as always,
thanks for listening.
katie
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