I am slowly crawling back and making my way with peace. With my hand upon my belly, my son signals his awakening. This nightly ritual brings me back.
Today was the day. Of all mundane and simple of days, today was the day - November 13, 2008. My son lets me know this is really happening and somehow, unconditionally, forgives me (i hope) for all my selfish maneuvers and thoughts.
I am crawling back today from 5 months of denial, selfish thoughts and behaviors. 5 months of asking; am i ready to welcome another baby? can i handle a 4th? why is this happening? why me? concentrating on all else except a child that will be born 15 weeks from today.
Today, i over did myself. I exerted far too much and as i sit on this couch, i am physically paying the price. I am sore, i am tight and i am too cognizant of what brought me to this place.
This has to be said: i am finding love for my son. A powerful love that needs to be addressed because of absence.
Today, tonight rather, i am humbly crawling back and look ahead to a journey renewed.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Saturday, November 8, 2008
It's a New Day
Will I Am
It's A New Day Lyrics Songwriters: N/A
I went asleep last night
Tired from the fight
I've been fighting for tomorrow
All my life
Yea I woke up this morning
Feeling brand new
'Cause the dreams that I've been dreaming
Have finally came true
It's a new day --It's a new day --It's a new day -- It's a new day -- It's a new day
It's been a long time coming
Up the mountain kept runnin'
Souls of freedom kept hummin'
Channeling Harriet Tubman
Kennedy, Lincoln, and King
We gotta invest in that dream
It feels like we're swimming upstream
It feels like we're stuck inbetween
A rock and a hard place,
We've been through the heartaches
And lived through the darkest days
If you and I made it this far,
Well then hey, we can make it all the way
And they said no we can't And we said yes we can
Remember it's you and me together
I woke up this morning
Feeling alright
I've been fightin' for tomorrow
All my life
Yea, I woke up this morning
Feeling brand new
Cause the dreams that I've been dreaming
Have finally came true
It's a new day (it's a new day)-- It's a new day (it's a new day) -- It's a new day --It's a new day!
It's been a long time waitin'
Waiting for this moment
Been a long time praying
Praying for this moment
We hope for this moment
And now that we own it
For life I will hold it
And I ain't gonna let it go
It's for fathers, our brothers,
Our friends who fought for freedom
Our sisters, our mothers,
Who died for us to be in this moment
Stop and cherish this moment
Stop and cherish this time
It's time for you and me
For us and we
That's you and me together
I woke up this morning
Feeling brand new
Cause the dreams that I've been dreaming
Have finally came true
Yea, I woke up this morning
Feeling alright
'Cause we weren't fighting for nothing
And the soldiers weren't fighting For nothing
No, Martin was dreaming for nothing
And Lincoln didn't change it for nothing
And children weren't crying for nothing
It's a new day It's a new day A new day It's a new day It's a new day!
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
History Shared
Today is a historical day.
I can say with confidence that every day is historical within reason and each piece of the passing minutes contribute to memories and building of ones character. Today, however, my children will be telling stories for generations. "I was there, with my parents, as they voted on the historical day." We will be watching the campaign on TV this evening and memories will slowly form in the folds of gray matter. Each child will cling onto relevant and significant moments.
How will this day unfold? I am not sure...we have hours to wait. How will the election results affect the minds and psyche of the American culture? I am not sure.....we have hours to wait. Will division of minds overpower the possibility of bonded union...we have hours to wait.
Whatever happens, whatever events transpire, whatever erupted cacophony prevails; November 4 is historic, and I can share that my day is far more significant now that I got to experience it with my children.
I can say with confidence that every day is historical within reason and each piece of the passing minutes contribute to memories and building of ones character. Today, however, my children will be telling stories for generations. "I was there, with my parents, as they voted on the historical day." We will be watching the campaign on TV this evening and memories will slowly form in the folds of gray matter. Each child will cling onto relevant and significant moments.
How will this day unfold? I am not sure...we have hours to wait. How will the election results affect the minds and psyche of the American culture? I am not sure.....we have hours to wait. Will division of minds overpower the possibility of bonded union...we have hours to wait.
Whatever happens, whatever events transpire, whatever erupted cacophony prevails; November 4 is historic, and I can share that my day is far more significant now that I got to experience it with my children.
Monday, October 27, 2008
Blown in Wind's Direction
There are times when the wind blows me off course and continues in doing so with deliberate and calculated force. As I am swept up; there are options before me ~ twist, turn, and fight my way back or surrender and capitulate to the sense of uncertainty.
Today, the leaf takes hold for one last time of the mothering tree. The wind rushes in, envelopes the leaf; seizing control and bringing forth a new destiny. The leaf surrenders and angelically dances through it's ballet.
I cup my hands over my mouth, take in a deep breath and watch this take place outside my window....I watch as I take off into the wind.
Today, the leaf takes hold for one last time of the mothering tree. The wind rushes in, envelopes the leaf; seizing control and bringing forth a new destiny. The leaf surrenders and angelically dances through it's ballet.
I cup my hands over my mouth, take in a deep breath and watch this take place outside my window....I watch as I take off into the wind.
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
From Before...
“Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. "Pooh," he whispered. "Yes, Piglet?" "Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's paw, "I just wanted to be sure of you."
The cat is nibbling the last morsels of his dinner while the refrigerator prolongs it's monotonous drone. The house breathes in a couple of creaks and cracks now and again, but presently, there is a repose.
What will you do within this time of quiet? How do you continue to find energy within the stillness? When the day is strong, it's energy carries you, pushes you, enfolds upon you; you barely have a moment to stop and ask for direction. Now, the tranquil begins to slowly saturate your existence; it penetrates your world, and much like the noise and clatter of the earlier day, it too, enfolds upon you. What will you do within this time of quiet?
The cat is nibbling the last morsels of his dinner while the refrigerator prolongs it's monotonous drone. The house breathes in a couple of creaks and cracks now and again, but presently, there is a repose.
What will you do within this time of quiet? How do you continue to find energy within the stillness? When the day is strong, it's energy carries you, pushes you, enfolds upon you; you barely have a moment to stop and ask for direction. Now, the tranquil begins to slowly saturate your existence; it penetrates your world, and much like the noise and clatter of the earlier day, it too, enfolds upon you. What will you do within this time of quiet?
fall is upon us...and other things
October 21, 2008
(Picture on left: baby avenson 18 weeks)
Today is the official beginning of Daybook and I am trying to encourage Perry to write. Simon has picked the Motorcycle Diaries for us to listen to during this time. I am sitting up against the fireplace warming my back. School seems to be going well and we were just invited out to play at a park on this beautiful day! We will go with the Ytterbergs and hopefully others. I am so glad Simon has decent taste in music.
John is currently in Florida --- actually, scratch that; he is in New York right now and will come home late Thursday evening - only to turn around in a week or two and do it again. Meanwhile, i am at home with the three, i am 19 weeks pregant and my sunroom is splattered with legos. Perry is in the process of color coordinating them into baskets. a hefty project.
Anyway, that is the current news; with the exception of Barrack Obama and John McCain running for president...OH, and Ralph Nadar. AND, today we will begin our study on Seurat - the pointilism impressionist. BUT, i have to admit, my current position is quite agreeable: fire, beautiful music and writing....what could be better~~ oh yes, all three children are writing as well. *what* they are writing is skeptical, but they are writing and that is the purpose of this excercise.
Life is good and i really don't think i am waiting for that inevitable crash to happen; i am just holding on to the goodness of it all!
Katie
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
Random again
So, a visit at daybook time and because it is Perry's turn, we have random music playing.
I have to say, i am in that spot. That spot that you begin to sink down into that piece of furniture and you know it is going to be a masterminded attempt to get out and upright again.
I am in that spot; thinking, what have i done?
With each question, i sink a bit deeper; although knowing it will be more difficult to get back up.
1. Am i doing right by my children?
2. Are they learning from me?
3. Is their experience of value?
4. Would they be better of elsewhere?
5. where did the fun go?
6. Are they isolated?
7. What is the way?
I have said this before; academically, my children are sound. Almost any child in a one on one environment is going to thrive. Are they thriving in everything else that is just as worthy and important? There are not daily play dates. There is not a lot of banter back and forth with classmates. There is no relationship building with classroom teachers.
I realize i am processing by selection. But I need to know if i have offered a world of opened senses...not a world of closed doors. I can not offer a classroom with children of different countries or socio-levels. I have what is only before me. I need time to think, to rearrange. When i plan for a week's lessons at 11pm the evening before; i am closed to the possibilities.
I need time. Time to figure what my first move will be on getting out of that spot.
I have to say, i am in that spot. That spot that you begin to sink down into that piece of furniture and you know it is going to be a masterminded attempt to get out and upright again.
I am in that spot; thinking, what have i done?
With each question, i sink a bit deeper; although knowing it will be more difficult to get back up.
1. Am i doing right by my children?
2. Are they learning from me?
3. Is their experience of value?
4. Would they be better of elsewhere?
5. where did the fun go?
6. Are they isolated?
7. What is the way?
I have said this before; academically, my children are sound. Almost any child in a one on one environment is going to thrive. Are they thriving in everything else that is just as worthy and important? There are not daily play dates. There is not a lot of banter back and forth with classmates. There is no relationship building with classroom teachers.
I realize i am processing by selection. But I need to know if i have offered a world of opened senses...not a world of closed doors. I can not offer a classroom with children of different countries or socio-levels. I have what is only before me. I need time to think, to rearrange. When i plan for a week's lessons at 11pm the evening before; i am closed to the possibilities.
I need time. Time to figure what my first move will be on getting out of that spot.
Monday, March 10, 2008
Almost Spring
Today is Daybook time and the four of us find ourselves sitting in this sun-soaked room; knees propped up on couches; little heads bopping in rhythm to the music, writing about whatever occurs at the moment.
I am trying to get my head on straight with so many things going on....little things that are hidden in details and often forgettable. Writing lists only helps if one remembers to check the list, or remembers to put the list in a prominent place. As much as i try to plan my life ahead of the waves, i am forever just barely making it over before it all comes crashing in. I think my life revolves around the 24 hours prior. Ideas, schedules, agendas begin a fabulous genesis in my mind with great advancement. If i were in charge of writing the 66 books of the bible, the beginning would be unparalleled to anything read before. There would be little mentioned in the middle and the book of Revelation would simply say, "Well, there ya go!"
Daybook time is just about over and then we will move on to reading The Winter of Red Snow - the Revolutionary War Diary of Abigail Jane Stewart. From there, we will move onto the poetry and biography of Phyllis Wheatley. The African American Slave who was well known for her poetry during the Revolutionary War period. The kids have to memorize one of her poems this week.
Talk to you soon.
I am trying to get my head on straight with so many things going on....little things that are hidden in details and often forgettable. Writing lists only helps if one remembers to check the list, or remembers to put the list in a prominent place. As much as i try to plan my life ahead of the waves, i am forever just barely making it over before it all comes crashing in. I think my life revolves around the 24 hours prior. Ideas, schedules, agendas begin a fabulous genesis in my mind with great advancement. If i were in charge of writing the 66 books of the bible, the beginning would be unparalleled to anything read before. There would be little mentioned in the middle and the book of Revelation would simply say, "Well, there ya go!"
Daybook time is just about over and then we will move on to reading The Winter of Red Snow - the Revolutionary War Diary of Abigail Jane Stewart. From there, we will move onto the poetry and biography of Phyllis Wheatley. The African American Slave who was well known for her poetry during the Revolutionary War period. The kids have to memorize one of her poems this week.
Talk to you soon.
Monday, March 3, 2008
Daybook TIme
I sit in this sunny corner of my room. Simon has once again been assigned the music and we are listening to B-52s - PLANET CLAIRE. It is hard not to bop around while typing. We are beginning an official week of school. the last two weeks have been rather sporadic with field trips, family matters and a trip out to California. So, the four of us ist in this sound filled environment, writing away.
We continue on our study of the Revolutionary War. I am trying to figure out where i can stop - but there is so much intriguing information. I would like to be done by late spring so that we may begin the Civil War. But I also have the War of 1812 to squeeze in. As I think out loud, i think that one year (such as this year) we will concentrate on American Wars and the following we will concentrate on explorers and inventors - within the same time frame. There is a world awaiting for us with Lewis and Clark.
All three seem to be committed to working through a home school environment for another year. When I tell my husband this, he supports the idea; but if i told him that i am taking the kids back to school and i will be going backto teaching, he would support that as well - as well as the idea of me playing tennis and eating ice cream every day.
One of my favorite B-52 songs is coming on. I need to gel and listen.
"Roll it over it your mind. Why don't you dance with me; i'm not no linberger. Why don't dance with me...i'm not no linberger. Just a linberger. Just a linberger. Dance this mess around. Dance this mess around. Everybody goes to parties, they dance this messa round. They do all 16 dances. They do the cookaloo - they do the shy tuna. They do the camel walk. They do the hypocrit. Hippy hippy boy hippy hippy shake." Okay, enough of that.
We continue on our study of the Revolutionary War. I am trying to figure out where i can stop - but there is so much intriguing information. I would like to be done by late spring so that we may begin the Civil War. But I also have the War of 1812 to squeeze in. As I think out loud, i think that one year (such as this year) we will concentrate on American Wars and the following we will concentrate on explorers and inventors - within the same time frame. There is a world awaiting for us with Lewis and Clark.
All three seem to be committed to working through a home school environment for another year. When I tell my husband this, he supports the idea; but if i told him that i am taking the kids back to school and i will be going backto teaching, he would support that as well - as well as the idea of me playing tennis and eating ice cream every day.
One of my favorite B-52 songs is coming on. I need to gel and listen.
"Roll it over it your mind. Why don't you dance with me; i'm not no linberger. Why don't dance with me...i'm not no linberger. Just a linberger. Just a linberger. Dance this mess around. Dance this mess around. Everybody goes to parties, they dance this messa round. They do all 16 dances. They do the cookaloo - they do the shy tuna. They do the camel walk. They do the hypocrit. Hippy hippy boy hippy hippy shake." Okay, enough of that.
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Randomness
Daybook Log
Today is Perry's day to pick the music. In keeping with Perry's personality, he contemplated and complained and decided to hit the random button. Perry; the random soul. We listened to Seal first and now there is some artist that i don't recognize. It might be Sinead; but i am not sure, maybe Allison Kraus. Hmmm.
This morning, I woke up at 8am and all three children were joyfully approaching me, saying they are half way done with their schoool work. Perry and Simon had been up since 6am. We are currently looking at 10:30 in the morning and we have one last item to attend to and the day is free.
Snuggle Time:
Sometimes I dread this time. I am not a person who can relax during the day. When 8:00 or 9:00 at night rolls around; then i can relax. So, to make time to sit on my bed and snuggle, or talk or play with stuffed animals takes a lot out of me. This time seems different to me than regular play time. Maybe because it is an "organized" amount of time to relax. It just gets to me - although, i know it is the kids' favorite part of their day.
Perry: this morning for snuggle time, Perry shared with me his valentine he made for me and then he wanted to show me how he can make his bed into something really comfy. "I don't know how i have the talent for making comfy beds, but i really know how to make them well. I even know how to make it without getting wrinkles in it. i will teach you."
Lucy: Lucy's time this morning consisted of getting out the book of questions. One question was, "Who drives you crazy?" she responded that her brother Perry drives her crazy. "Perry drives me crazy because of all the funny-ness he does! WHAT? He really does!"
Last sentence of the day:
When i am given the time to relax -and it is etched out for me - why do i complain? AND, why do I complain throughout the day that I don't have enough time?
Today is Perry's day to pick the music. In keeping with Perry's personality, he contemplated and complained and decided to hit the random button. Perry; the random soul. We listened to Seal first and now there is some artist that i don't recognize. It might be Sinead; but i am not sure, maybe Allison Kraus. Hmmm.
This morning, I woke up at 8am and all three children were joyfully approaching me, saying they are half way done with their schoool work. Perry and Simon had been up since 6am. We are currently looking at 10:30 in the morning and we have one last item to attend to and the day is free.
Snuggle Time:
Sometimes I dread this time. I am not a person who can relax during the day. When 8:00 or 9:00 at night rolls around; then i can relax. So, to make time to sit on my bed and snuggle, or talk or play with stuffed animals takes a lot out of me. This time seems different to me than regular play time. Maybe because it is an "organized" amount of time to relax. It just gets to me - although, i know it is the kids' favorite part of their day.
Perry: this morning for snuggle time, Perry shared with me his valentine he made for me and then he wanted to show me how he can make his bed into something really comfy. "I don't know how i have the talent for making comfy beds, but i really know how to make them well. I even know how to make it without getting wrinkles in it. i will teach you."
Lucy: Lucy's time this morning consisted of getting out the book of questions. One question was, "Who drives you crazy?" she responded that her brother Perry drives her crazy. "Perry drives me crazy because of all the funny-ness he does! WHAT? He really does!"
Last sentence of the day:
When i am given the time to relax -and it is etched out for me - why do i complain? AND, why do I complain throughout the day that I don't have enough time?
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
Daybook Log #4
So - today is lucy's day to pick out the music for daybook and she has chosen her first introductory piano book CD. It is quite jazzy and upbeat; "Will you play some black keys, loudly please?" It is very funny.
This morning, we continued our study of George Frideric Handel. I *think* the kids are enjoying this. We listened to a CD that told all about his life as a musician and had samples of his music. Lucy and Simon danced around for a while and sang along with the Messiah.
So, again, whatever they get out of this, I am pleased because I know they would not be getting this in school. I have butcher paper on the wall with four three blocked off sections of Bach, Handel and Vivaldi. The kids remarked today that George's father wasn't into music as much as Bach's father was and that Bach and Handel were born in the same year as well as noting the different instruments that each composer learned at a young age.
Anyway, this is where my passion is - watching my children learn. Seeing information they have acquired come out in day to day conversation. Simon even made a parallel with a princess during Handels time marrying King George III - a king during the time of the Revolutionary War period (it was not the same princess; but the point is that he is making connections with names and events).
Today, we will continue with a chemistry experiment as well as math and then this afternoon, Lucy and Simon have Book Club.
Oh - i have to quickly put this in. Yesterday we delivered food for the food shelf to a man named, Patrick. The kids were there to help and this man couldn't have been more thankful. It was exceptional for the kids to experience how they can change or add to the goodness of the world.
Life is going well.
Enjoy the day.
This morning, we continued our study of George Frideric Handel. I *think* the kids are enjoying this. We listened to a CD that told all about his life as a musician and had samples of his music. Lucy and Simon danced around for a while and sang along with the Messiah.
So, again, whatever they get out of this, I am pleased because I know they would not be getting this in school. I have butcher paper on the wall with four three blocked off sections of Bach, Handel and Vivaldi. The kids remarked today that George's father wasn't into music as much as Bach's father was and that Bach and Handel were born in the same year as well as noting the different instruments that each composer learned at a young age.
Anyway, this is where my passion is - watching my children learn. Seeing information they have acquired come out in day to day conversation. Simon even made a parallel with a princess during Handels time marrying King George III - a king during the time of the Revolutionary War period (it was not the same princess; but the point is that he is making connections with names and events).
Today, we will continue with a chemistry experiment as well as math and then this afternoon, Lucy and Simon have Book Club.
Oh - i have to quickly put this in. Yesterday we delivered food for the food shelf to a man named, Patrick. The kids were there to help and this man couldn't have been more thankful. It was exceptional for the kids to experience how they can change or add to the goodness of the world.
Life is going well.
Enjoy the day.
Monday, February 4, 2008
DAYBOOK LOG # 3
Perry picked the music today "Classic Relaxation with Mozart." Currently, it is lightly snowing. The trees are sporting their new snow frosted outfits :)
In an hour or so, we will head out to Chanhassen to the Feed My Starving Children Facility www.fmsc.org . The kids and I will package food up to be sent off to a selected third world country. You Tube had some pretty cool video on people's experiences at FMSC as well as videos that really captured the essence of world hunger. I feel that with each block I lay upon the other, my children *should* be receiving an idea of what it is to be a loving and caring individual.
I am trying to think back to my own childhood experiences. I know that my family was on the receiving end, quite often, of charitable donations from our church. We were the "family of the month" at times tha t the congregation supported. I can't say that I remember a lot of times that we gave back. I can be wrong; but nothing currently stands out.
I remember my mother taking in people who needed a place to stay - typically young collegues from the school she taught at; PE Coach, 7th grade teacher, i think another PE coach. I can't remember. For a while, we always had some young adult living with us - perhaps my mom collected rent from them; i am not sure. Again, questions i need answered.
Two more minutes of daybook time. The kids are all engaged. I look forward to this time.
In an hour or so, we will head out to Chanhassen to the Feed My Starving Children Facility www.fmsc.org . The kids and I will package food up to be sent off to a selected third world country. You Tube had some pretty cool video on people's experiences at FMSC as well as videos that really captured the essence of world hunger. I feel that with each block I lay upon the other, my children *should* be receiving an idea of what it is to be a loving and caring individual.
I am trying to think back to my own childhood experiences. I know that my family was on the receiving end, quite often, of charitable donations from our church. We were the "family of the month" at times tha t the congregation supported. I can't say that I remember a lot of times that we gave back. I can be wrong; but nothing currently stands out.
I remember my mother taking in people who needed a place to stay - typically young collegues from the school she taught at; PE Coach, 7th grade teacher, i think another PE coach. I can't remember. For a while, we always had some young adult living with us - perhaps my mom collected rent from them; i am not sure. Again, questions i need answered.
Two more minutes of daybook time. The kids are all engaged. I look forward to this time.
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
Smart in the Arts
This morning, we jumped right into things. Yesterday, we continued with our "Smart in the Arts" theme and we studied JS Bach - marking down on large poster paper all the things we have learned so far about this great composer. Today, as we continued, we listened to a radio program, Classics for Kids. We listened to music by Bach as well as a story told my the radio narrator. Afterwards, we brought up all time favorite lesson filler; You Tube. We watched many videos on his compositions. The kids also had requests: Prepare Thyself Zion. After that we visited sites dedicated to Edvard Grieg...Simon's favorite classic composer just because he looks "crazy". We are now off to study more about the Revolutionary War and then meet up with friends at the Minneapolis Institute of Arts for a docent tour. Quite the cultural day.
Links:
Classics for Kids: http://www.classicsforkids.com/composers/bio.asp?id=2
You Tube :
Bach - cool animation. Toccata and Fugue in D Minor http://youtube.com/watch?v=ipzR9bhei_o
Bach: Rostropovich plays the Prelude from Bach's Cello Suite No. 1 : http://youtube.com/watch?v=LU_QR_FTt3E
Bach: Prepare Thyself, Zion: http://youtube.com/watch?v=BNZVe16N28I
Edvard Grieg: In the Hall of the Mountain King: http://youtube.com/watch?v=3TgVeQ44pEY
Links:
Classics for Kids: http://www.classicsforkids.com/composers/bio.asp?id=2
You Tube :
Bach - cool animation. Toccata and Fugue in D Minor http://youtube.com/watch?v=ipzR9bhei_o
Bach: Rostropovich plays the Prelude from Bach's Cello Suite No. 1 : http://youtube.com/watch?v=LU_QR_FTt3E
Bach: Prepare Thyself, Zion: http://youtube.com/watch?v=BNZVe16N28I
Edvard Grieg: In the Hall of the Mountain King: http://youtube.com/watch?v=3TgVeQ44pEY
Monday, January 28, 2008
Going Against Nature
Our little lives get complicated; it’s a simple thing – simple as a flower and that is a complicated thing. My world is your world. People like to hear there names. I’m no exception, please call my name.
DAY BOOK LOG 2
A relatively cloudy day, but really cool music is playing during Day Book Time. I made a CD for the boys quite a while ago with some of the music that I listened to in high school. So, today, Simon put in a song from Love and Rockets
So, daybook number 2 – I wonder what other entries will grace cyberspace. Will they all begin with song lyrics and upbeat feeling or will some be of a mother’s angst against her children – wondering why she ever made this step in the first place.
So, three days ago, I turned the magical 40. It would be fun for me to take a cross section of 40 year olds within different cultures and sub cultures – compare accomplishments, failures, dreams un-weaved. I would like to ask a battery of questions :
1. What significant life experiences prove to make up who you are today
2. What has been a remarkable accomplishment in your 40 years of spinning
3. Have you made changes to the way you lived once you turned 40
4. Has turning 40 changed your disposition on life
5. How is life daring you
6. When has your life seemed the most complacent
7. When has your life been the most unsettled
8. How do you find peace
9. When was your life marked by a direction you wish you didn’t have to take
10. Has you life been a bitter sweet symphony - describe
11. What urges you to continue spinning on this wild ride?
Then, after we had a round table discussion, I would give them each a copy of Robert Frosts’ The Road Less Traveled .
Day Book time has come to an end. Till tomorrow.
I want to stay as close to the edge as I can without going over. Out on the edge you see all kinds of things you can't see from the center.
Kurt VonnegutUS novelist (1922 - 2007)
DAY BOOK LOG 2
A relatively cloudy day, but really cool music is playing during Day Book Time. I made a CD for the boys quite a while ago with some of the music that I listened to in high school. So, today, Simon put in a song from Love and Rockets
So, daybook number 2 – I wonder what other entries will grace cyberspace. Will they all begin with song lyrics and upbeat feeling or will some be of a mother’s angst against her children – wondering why she ever made this step in the first place.
So, three days ago, I turned the magical 40. It would be fun for me to take a cross section of 40 year olds within different cultures and sub cultures – compare accomplishments, failures, dreams un-weaved. I would like to ask a battery of questions :
1. What significant life experiences prove to make up who you are today
2. What has been a remarkable accomplishment in your 40 years of spinning
3. Have you made changes to the way you lived once you turned 40
4. Has turning 40 changed your disposition on life
5. How is life daring you
6. When has your life seemed the most complacent
7. When has your life been the most unsettled
8. How do you find peace
9. When was your life marked by a direction you wish you didn’t have to take
10. Has you life been a bitter sweet symphony - describe
11. What urges you to continue spinning on this wild ride?
Then, after we had a round table discussion, I would give them each a copy of Robert Frosts’ The Road Less Traveled .
Day Book time has come to an end. Till tomorrow.
I want to stay as close to the edge as I can without going over. Out on the edge you see all kinds of things you can't see from the center.
Kurt VonnegutUS novelist (1922 - 2007)
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
DAYBOOK Log
1:38pm on Tuesday.
It is now officially, DAYBOOK time with the kids. What is Daybook? Each child has a composition book and for 15 minutes, they write in their 'daybooks'. Perry and Simon are sitting together with their books on the couch. The two are bent on their knees, leaning forward. Lucy is on her knees, facing the coffee table. I am currently by the fire place. During Daybook time, a selected child gets to pick out music. Lucy has picked out her piano lesson CD. I am hoping that this is a successful time for all of us.
It is quiet, there is music and, crossing fingers, there is writing. We are beginning with 15 minutes and maybe we will need to tone it down to 10. I think this would be a good end to our day. We are supposed to go to the art store today to get canvas for our "Frida Kahlo" self-portraits. We will see if we make it. It is 2pm and we are still doing school. We also have the food shelf to work at this afternoon.
Today has been a good math day for all three kids. Simon is learning about parallel and perpendicular lines. Perry is still dividing fractions and Lucy's big word for the day was Place Value Notation. It scared her at first, but she is understanding it and now able to add three digit numbers together. If she was still sitting in a first grade desk, she would be adding dominoes together with values of 6 and 3. Today, all three kids had their first introductory lesson on the American Revolution. We went around chanting, "No More Tea! No More Tea!" to symbolize the Boston Tea Party and we made a rap song up about the mean King George the III.
Lucy just read me her Daybook entry and in it, her stuffed animal is quoted as saying, "No more Tea! No more TEA!" I think she had a good lesson today :)
2:00 and it is time to stop.
King George the III
Oh What a NERD
He tried to tax Stamps and TEA
So the colonists had a PAR-TY
Dressed as Indians
They went on the boat
They threw the tea over
And it didn’t float
King George got mad
And made a line of boats
No one could get through
The swimming goats
Colonists wanted to be free
They made an army for you and me
The revolution started and guys did fight
They fought all day ‘til the British took flight.
This is the end of our colonial rap
So let’s have fun and take a good nap
By: Simon, Perry, Lucy and Mommy
It is now officially, DAYBOOK time with the kids. What is Daybook? Each child has a composition book and for 15 minutes, they write in their 'daybooks'. Perry and Simon are sitting together with their books on the couch. The two are bent on their knees, leaning forward. Lucy is on her knees, facing the coffee table. I am currently by the fire place. During Daybook time, a selected child gets to pick out music. Lucy has picked out her piano lesson CD. I am hoping that this is a successful time for all of us.
It is quiet, there is music and, crossing fingers, there is writing. We are beginning with 15 minutes and maybe we will need to tone it down to 10. I think this would be a good end to our day. We are supposed to go to the art store today to get canvas for our "Frida Kahlo" self-portraits. We will see if we make it. It is 2pm and we are still doing school. We also have the food shelf to work at this afternoon.
Today has been a good math day for all three kids. Simon is learning about parallel and perpendicular lines. Perry is still dividing fractions and Lucy's big word for the day was Place Value Notation. It scared her at first, but she is understanding it and now able to add three digit numbers together. If she was still sitting in a first grade desk, she would be adding dominoes together with values of 6 and 3. Today, all three kids had their first introductory lesson on the American Revolution. We went around chanting, "No More Tea! No More Tea!" to symbolize the Boston Tea Party and we made a rap song up about the mean King George the III.
Lucy just read me her Daybook entry and in it, her stuffed animal is quoted as saying, "No more Tea! No more TEA!" I think she had a good lesson today :)
2:00 and it is time to stop.
King George the III
Oh What a NERD
He tried to tax Stamps and TEA
So the colonists had a PAR-TY
Dressed as Indians
They went on the boat
They threw the tea over
And it didn’t float
King George got mad
And made a line of boats
No one could get through
The swimming goats
Colonists wanted to be free
They made an army for you and me
The revolution started and guys did fight
They fought all day ‘til the British took flight.
This is the end of our colonial rap
So let’s have fun and take a good nap
By: Simon, Perry, Lucy and Mommy
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Log 1
Short day;
but highly
caffeinated - yeah!
Physics Force: A highly visual and energized production surrounding the incredibly complicated world of physics. A group of comedic physicists demonstrating their science in a "wow factor" way.
Piano Lessons for two: Piano teacher allows Simon to create a new song and put in on the docket for student recital that will soon be coming up.
Tobogganing: Our neighbor, voted the "Best Dad Ever" by children all around, has created a slick toboggan run. Cheeks are rosy, hands are frozen, and "This is awesome!" can be heard from miles around.
Harness the Stillness
On the radio, the Jonas Brothers are singing some song about the year 3000. My three children are in the back seat trying to keep the beat when the oldest takes his brother’s hat off his head. The bickering sets in motion
“Gimme my hat!”
“Gimme my hat” mimics the older one, in a more acute tone.
“I mean it!”
“I mean it” again, with the mimic.
The youngest child decides now would be a decent time to sound off the reasons why she should not be wearing the shoes I picked out for her to wear. The laces are too long, they are hard to tie if they come undone and she used to like the color brown, but now she might like the color brown next year. The drama cry kicks in and the remainder of her debate is unintelligible.
I continue our drive and as I take in a deep breath and tune out the fervent discussions in back;
I find stillness within
My son, Perry, blares a pre-programmed song on the keyboard; while Lucy plays her three note song on the piano in the adjoining room. Simon asks where the microphone is so he can make up a song to the fanatical sound. Before I rein them in; before I scream;
I find stillness within
My children are in full swing with getting their day started. One drops a plate with a waffle upon it, another stubs their toe on the edge of a chair, while the last one spanks his brother with the hand of his stuffed animal. The oldest remarks, “Crazy things happen here every day!” And it is only 8:30 in the morning.
I find stillness within
I choose to make stillness part of my life. God provides every resource I need to continue in my walk. When “crazy things happen here every day” kinds of moments take hold, I can look to Him. It takes shorter than a moment of time to find a sense of peace and strength. I know He has my back and when days are less tame than others and I do not find nor desire those peaceful moments; I know He is there; waiting in the stillness for me to return, waiting for our connection with the other, waiting for my peace to be filled.
“Gimme my hat!”
“Gimme my hat” mimics the older one, in a more acute tone.
“I mean it!”
“I mean it” again, with the mimic.
The youngest child decides now would be a decent time to sound off the reasons why she should not be wearing the shoes I picked out for her to wear. The laces are too long, they are hard to tie if they come undone and she used to like the color brown, but now she might like the color brown next year. The drama cry kicks in and the remainder of her debate is unintelligible.
I continue our drive and as I take in a deep breath and tune out the fervent discussions in back;
I find stillness within
My son, Perry, blares a pre-programmed song on the keyboard; while Lucy plays her three note song on the piano in the adjoining room. Simon asks where the microphone is so he can make up a song to the fanatical sound. Before I rein them in; before I scream;
I find stillness within
My children are in full swing with getting their day started. One drops a plate with a waffle upon it, another stubs their toe on the edge of a chair, while the last one spanks his brother with the hand of his stuffed animal. The oldest remarks, “Crazy things happen here every day!” And it is only 8:30 in the morning.
I find stillness within
I choose to make stillness part of my life. God provides every resource I need to continue in my walk. When “crazy things happen here every day” kinds of moments take hold, I can look to Him. It takes shorter than a moment of time to find a sense of peace and strength. I know He has my back and when days are less tame than others and I do not find nor desire those peaceful moments; I know He is there; waiting in the stillness for me to return, waiting for our connection with the other, waiting for my peace to be filled.
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
I just wanted to be sure of you
“Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. "Pooh," he whispered. "Yes, Piglet?" "Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's paw, "I just wanted to be sure of you."”
The cat is nibbling the last morsels of his dinner while the refrigerator prolongs it's monotonous drone. The house breathes in a couple of creaks and cracks now and again, but presently, there is a repose.
What will you do within this time of quiet? How do you continue to find energy within the stillness? When the day is strong, it's energy carries you, pushes you, enfolds upon you; you barely have a moment to stop and ask for direction. Now, the tranquil begins to slowly saturate your existence; It penetrates your world, and much like the noise and clatter of the earlier day, it too, enfolds upon you. What will you do within this time of quiet?
The cat is nibbling the last morsels of his dinner while the refrigerator prolongs it's monotonous drone. The house breathes in a couple of creaks and cracks now and again, but presently, there is a repose.
What will you do within this time of quiet? How do you continue to find energy within the stillness? When the day is strong, it's energy carries you, pushes you, enfolds upon you; you barely have a moment to stop and ask for direction. Now, the tranquil begins to slowly saturate your existence; It penetrates your world, and much like the noise and clatter of the earlier day, it too, enfolds upon you. What will you do within this time of quiet?
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