Crawling Back

I am slowly crawling back and making my way with peace. With my hand upon my belly, my son signals his awakening. This nightly ritual brings me back.

Today was the day. Of all mundane and simple of days, today was the day - November 13, 2008. My son lets me know this is really happening and somehow, unconditionally, forgives me (i hope) for all my selfish maneuvers and thoughts.

I am crawling back today from 5 months of denial, selfish thoughts and behaviors. 5 months of asking; am i ready to welcome another baby? can i handle a 4th? why is this happening? why me? concentrating on all else except a child that will be born 15 weeks from today.

Today, i over did myself. I exerted far too much and as i sit on this couch, i am physically paying the price. I am sore, i am tight and i am too cognizant of what brought me to this place.

This has to be said: i am finding love for my son. A powerful love that needs to be addressed because of absence.

Today, tonight rather, i am humbly crawling back and look ahead to a journey renewed.

It's a New Day

Will I Am

It's A New Day Lyrics Songwriters: N/A

VIDEO

I went asleep last night

Tired from the fight

I've been fighting for tomorrow

All my life

Yea I woke up this morning

Feeling brand new

'Cause the dreams that I've been dreaming

Have finally came true

It's a new day --It's a new day --It's a new day -- It's a new day -- It's a new day

It's been a long time coming

Up the mountain kept runnin'

Souls of freedom kept hummin'

Channeling Harriet Tubman

Kennedy, Lincoln, and King

We gotta invest in that dream

It feels like we're swimming upstream

It feels like we're stuck inbetween

A rock and a hard place,

We've been through the heartaches

And lived through the darkest days

If you and I made it this far,

Well then hey, we can make it all the way

And they said no we can't And we said yes we can

Remember it's you and me together

I woke up this morning

Feeling alright

I've been fightin' for tomorrow

All my life

Yea, I woke up this morning

Feeling brand new

Cause the dreams that I've been dreaming

Have finally came true

It's a new day (it's a new day)-- It's a new day (it's a new day) -- It's a new day --It's a new day!

It's been a long time waitin'

Waiting for this moment

Been a long time praying

Praying for this moment

We hope for this moment

And now that we own it

For life I will hold it

And I ain't gonna let it go

It's for fathers, our brothers,

Our friends who fought for freedom

Our sisters, our mothers,

Who died for us to be in this moment

Stop and cherish this moment

Stop and cherish this time

It's time for you and me

For us and we

That's you and me together

I woke up this morning

Feeling brand new

Cause the dreams that I've been dreaming

Have finally came true

Yea, I woke up this morning

Feeling alright

'Cause we weren't fighting for nothing

And the soldiers weren't fighting For nothing

No, Martin was dreaming for nothing

And Lincoln didn't change it for nothing

And children weren't crying for nothing

It's a new day It's a new day A new day It's a new day It's a new day!

History Shared

Today is a historical day.

I can say with confidence that every day is historical within reason and each piece of the passing minutes contribute to memories and building of ones character. Today, however, my children will be telling stories for generations. "I was there, with my parents, as they voted on the historical day." We will be watching the campaign on TV this evening and memories will slowly form in the folds of gray matter. Each child will cling onto relevant and significant moments.

How will this day unfold? I am not sure...we have hours to wait. How will the election results affect the minds and psyche of the American culture? I am not sure.....we have hours to wait. Will division of minds overpower the possibility of bonded union...we have hours to wait.

Whatever happens, whatever events transpire, whatever erupted cacophony prevails; November 4 is historic, and I can share that my day is far more significant now that I got to experience it with my children.