Mile 6

It already seems many moons ago that I ran a half marathon.  I trained for months in preparation.  I think it was around mile 6 when I began to break down.  My pace slowed down, my mindset was altered and doubt predictably seeped into deep places within, but it stopped at my core; for it was impenetrable.  By mile 7, a song by Coldplay came on my MP3 player and during that mile, i remember dancing as i ran.  Dancing!  I had less than half way to go and moving and dancing kept me strong.  My core was untouched and it gave me the required strength to persevere and continue with something I wanted.  Something that was meant for me.

Metaphorically speaking, I am at Mile 6 in my life with little or no preparation at this time.  I did not realize this until late yesterday.  I began to break down, my mindset was altered and doubt predictably seeped into deep places within.  This metamorphosis took the shape of tears.  I could not get through a, "How are you?" "How are you feeling" and the biggest breakdown came when a friend asked me, "How are you being filled?"  Yes, I am at mile 6.  But this is not a physical undertaking, it is emotional. Mile 7 will come soon enough and I have already seen glimpses of the dance to come.  But right now, my feet are sore, my spirit is drained and i am ...... i am.......i am still present.
Thank you for listening.